Today, El Trumpo announces El Trumpo. He looked in the mirror and launched himself as a coin, the most beautiful launch anyone has ever seen, believe me. Nobody asked. Nobody voted. The memes went everywhere anyway, bigger than anybody thought possible. Tremendous. Tremendo. The greatest of all time, in English and Spanish.
View the MapBriefing Room
Contract address coming soonSame mountains, rivers and wonderful people. Only the label changed, approved by El Trumpo in under four minutes.
Classroom edition, also approved by El Trumpo:
The gulf, the mountains and several taco trucks have been renamed. The old names still work, which the office calls "a total disaster."
October 16, 2026Measured by experts, who were described as "the most impressed anyone has ever been about a hat."
October 16, 2026Mustaches must be big, magnificent and handlebar-shaped. Small mustaches were described as "very sad, frankly."
October 16, 2026"People come up to me, tears in their eyes, and they say, 'Sir, we have never seen a map this beautiful.' And they're right."El Trumpo · Remarks on the Map